Teen Dating Violence: What We All Need to Know

As a community, we are coming to realize that violence between intimate partners happens all too frequently--regardless of race, ethnicity, religion, or economic status. Although we have often overlooked its earliest signs and results--teen dating violence--statistics suggest that we need to pay much closer attention. The national Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that 1 in 5 teenage girls has been affected by abuse in a dating relationship.

As teenage girls, we need to know the warning signs of abuse. Do any or all of the descriptions in this list sound like your guy? Even if there hasn't been any physical abuse or if he doesn't exhibit every one of these signs, this is not a healthy relationship.

• He's extremely jealous.
• He's constantly insulting you or ridiculing you.
• He tells you want you can and cannot do, whom you can and cannot see.
• He wants to control your finances.
• He accuses you of things you haven't done.
• He tries to keep you from spending time with your family or friends.
• He calls, emails, or texts you throughout the day to find out exactly where you are.

As parents, how can we tell whether our daughters are in an abusive relationship? If your daughter exhibits any of these signs, something is probably bothering her. It could be an abusive relationship.

• She has trouble sleeping.
• Her eating habits change.
• She isn't spending time with her friends like she used to.
• Her grades are dropping.
• She spends an unusual amount of time answering calls, emails, or texts from her boyfriend.

If this is an abusive relationship, Jewish Family Service can help. We offer crisis intervention and safety planning, individual counseling for teens or adults affected by abuse, parent/child counseling, legal consultation, group counseling for women affected by abuse, and individual counseling for the abuser when appropriate. Our phone is answered 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. 972.437.9950. Our services are provided without regard to religion, race, ethnicity, or the ability to pay.